One of the most prevalent standards made for woman, has been the standard of men. But what we so often forget is that God has honored the woman by giving her value in relation to Himself-not in relation to men.
Yet, as western feminism erased God from the scene, there was no standard left-but men. As a result the western feminist was forced to find her value in relation to a man. And in so doing she had accepted a faulty assumption. She had accepted that man is the standard, and thus a woman can never be a full human being until she becomes just like a man: the standard.
When a man cut his hair short, she wanted to cut her hair short. When man joined the army, she wanted to join the army. She wanted these things for no other reason than because the “standard” had them.
What she didn’t recognize was that God dignifies both men and women in their distinctiveness-not in their sameness. When we accept men as the standard, suddenly anything uniquely feminine becomes by definition inferior.
Being sensitive is an insult, becoming a full time mother- a degradation.
In the battle between stoic rationality (considered masculine) and selfless compassion (considered feminine), rationality reigned supreme.
As soon as we accepted that everything a man has and does is better, all that followed was just a knee-jerk reaction: if men have it – we want it too.
Somewhere along the line we’d accepted the notion that having a position of worldly leadership is some indication of one’s position with God.
Given our privilege as women, we only degrade ourselves by trying to be something we’re not-and in all honesty-don’t want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach true liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and value the God-given distinctiveness.
And yet, in society there is another prevalent “master” which has defined for women their worth. And that is the so-called standard of beauty. Since the time we were little, we as women, have been taught a very clear message by society. And that message is: Be thin. Be sexy. Be attractive. Or…be nothing.
So we were told to put on their make-up, and wear short skirts. Instructed to give our lives, our bodies, and our dignity for the cause of being pretty. We came to believe that no matter what we did, we were worthy only to the degree that we could please and be beautiful for men.
So we spent our lives on the cover of Cosmo and we gave our bodies for advertisers to sell.
We were slaves, but they taught us we were free. We were their object, but they swore it was success. Because they taught you that the purpose of your life was to be on display, to attract and be beautiful for men. They had you believe that your body was created to market their cars.
But they lied.
Your body, your soul was created for something higher. Something so much higher.
So you are honored. But it is not by your relationship to men-either being them or pleasing them. Your value as a woman is not measured by the size of your waist or the number of men who like you. Your worth as a human being is measured on a higher scale: a scale of righteousness and piety. And your purpose in life-despite what the fashion magazines say-is something more sublime than just looking good for men.
Our completion comes from God and our relationship with Him. And yet, from the time we were little, we, as women have been taught that we will never reach completion until a man comes to complete us.
Like Cinderella we were taught that we are helpless unless a prince comes to save us.
Like sleeping beauty, we were told that our life doesn’t fully begin, until Prince Charming kisses us.
But here’s the thing; no prince can complete you. And no knight can save you.
Only God can.
Excerpt Reclaim Your Heart by Yasmin Mogahed
Live and Learn. We All Do.
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